| Off | Def | Total | Score |
|---|
| Away | Westside Smoke | 169 | 108 | 277 | 31 | | Home | The Blitz | 183 | 108 | 291 | 38 |
| The Blitz |
Westside Smoke |
|---|
| I | Steve McNair QB BAL | 0 |
| I | Shaun King QB ??? | 0 |
| I | Kyle Boller QB BAL | 0 |
| S | Peyton Manning QB IND | 24 |
| S | Jim Sorgi QB IND | 0 |
| S | Jamaal Jackson OC PHI | 11 |
| I | Dan Koppen OC NE | 0 |
| S | Matt Lehr OG ATL | 5 |
| I | Kyle Kosier OG DAL | 0 |
| S | Logan Mankins OG/OT NE | 9 |
| S | Ryan Tucker OT CLE | 0 |
| I | Orlando Pace OT LAR | 0 |
| S | Tony Pashos OT BAL | 6 |
| I | Nick Kaczur OT NE | 0 |
| I | Ryan Lilja OG IND | 0 |
| I | Leonard Davis OT ARI | 0 |
| B | Mike Alstott FB TB | 2 |
| B | Mike Sellers FB WAS | 6 |
| S | Thomas Tapeh FB PHI | 11 |
| B | Jason McKie FB CHI | 2 |
| I | Greg Jones FB ??? | 0 |
| B | Noah Herron RB GB | 1 |
| S | Deuce McAllister RB NO | 15 |
| B | Maurice Jones-Drew RB JAC | 7 |
| S | Willie Parker RB PIT | 31 |
| B | Samkon Gado RB HOU | 0 |
| B | Josh Reed WR BUF | 3 |
| B | Jermaine Wiggins TE MIN | 2 |
| S | Todd Heap TE BAL | 22 |
| B | David Martin TE GB | 3 |
| S | Ben Utecht TE IND | 6 |
| I | Anthony Fasano TE DAL | 0 |
| I | Nate Kaeding K LAC | 0 |
| S | Matt Stover K BAL | 13 |
| S | Saint Louis OST LAR | 0 |
| B | Mario Williams DE HOU | 2 |
| B | Ebenezer Ekuban DE DEN | 1 |
| S | Justin Smith DE CIN | 9 |
| I | Terdell Sands NT LV | 0 |
| S | Isaac Sopoaga NT SF | 1 |
| S | Ty Warren DE NE | 8 |
| B | Willie McGinest OLB CLE | 4 |
| S | Jonathan Vilma ILB NYJ | 15 |
| B | Osi Umenyiora DE NYG | 2 |
| B | Keith O'Neil OLB IND | 1 |
| S | Boss Bailey OLB DET | 5 |
| I | Akin Ayodele ILB DAL | 0 |
| I | Derrick Johnson OLB KC | 0 |
| S | Chris McAlister CB BAL | 7 |
| B | Tory James CB CIN | 1 |
| I | Quentin Jammer CB LAC | 0 |
| S | Nathan Vasher CB CHI | 4 |
| S | Madieu Williams S CIN | 10 |
| S | Nick Ferguson S DEN | 6 |
| S | Eugene Wilson S NE | 5 |
| S | Donovin Darius S JAC | 5 |
| I | Bob Sanders S IND | 0 |
| S | Chris Gardocki P PIT | 3 |
| I | Brian Moorman P BUF | 0 |
| S | New England DST NE | 19 |
|
| I | Drew Bledsoe QB DAL | 0 |
| S | Brian St. Pierre QB ??? | 0 |
| I | Tony Romo QB DAL | 0 |
| S | Ben Roethlisberger QB PIT | -2 |
| S | Charlie Batch QB PIT | 0 |
| S | Jeff Saturday OC IND | 4 |
| I | Seth McKinney OC/OG ??? | 0 |
| S | Adam Timmerman OG LAR | 6 |
| I | Kendall Simmons OG PIT | 0 |
| S | Derrick Dockery OG/OT WAS | 20 |
| S | John Tait OT CHI | 7 |
| I | Shane Olivea OT LAC | 0 |
| S | Ryan Diem OT IND | 4 |
| I | Reggie Wells OC/OG ARI | 0 |
| S | Warrick Dunn RB ATL | 7 |
| S | Clinton Portis RB WAS | 33 |
| B | Brian Westbrook RB PHI | 10 |
| I | Priest Holmes RB ??? | 0 |
| B | Wes Welker WR MIA | 2 |
| S | Santana Moss WR WAS | 13 |
| I | Sinorice Moss WR NYG | 0 |
| B | Matt Jones WR JAC | 0 |
| S | Torry Holt WR LAR | 29 |
| S | Bernard Berrian WR CHI | 15 |
| B | Joey Galloway WR TB | 2 |
| I | Santonio Holmes WR PIT | 0 |
| S | Jeff Wilkins K LAR | 12 |
| I | Mike Vanderjagt K DAL | 0 |
| S | Seattle OST SEA | 7 |
| B | Orpheus Roye DE CLE | 0 |
| S | Kyle Vanden Bosch DE TEN | 7 |
| B | Robert Geathers DE CIN | 5 |
| B | Keith Traylor DT MIA | 7 |
| B | Montae Reagor DT IND | 2 |
| S | Michael Myers DT DEN | 5 |
| S | Shaun Rogers DT DET | 4 |
| S | Marques Douglas DE SF | 1 |
| B | Kris Jenkins DT CAR | 0 |
| I | Tamba Hali DE KC | 0 |
| S | Gerald Hayes MLB ARI | 14 |
| S | Karlos Dansby OLB ARI | 2 |
| B | Nick Greisen OLB JAC | 0 |
| B | Brian Urlacher MLB CHI | 5 |
| S | Julian Peterson OLB SEA | 2 |
| B | Patrick Chukwurah OLB DEN | 1 |
| I | Freddy Keiaho OLB IND | 0 |
| S | Asante Samuel CB NE | 5 |
| B | Reynaldo Hill CB TEN | 2 |
| I | Kelvin Hayden CB IND | 0 |
| B | Kevin Mathis CB ATL | 4 |
| S | Nate Clements CB BUF | 6 |
| B | Kalvin Pearson CB TB | 1 |
| I | Greg Wesley S KC | 0 |
| B | Brian Russell S CLE | 3 |
| I | Pat Watkins S DAL | 0 |
| S | Terrence Holt S DET | 6 |
| S | Oshiomogho Atogwe S LAR | 10 |
| B | Jason Simmons CB HOU | 1 |
| I | Tank Williams DB ??? | 0 |
| I | Mitch Berger P ??? | 0 |
| I | Kyle Larson P CIN | 0 |
| S | Brad Maynard P CHI | 15 |
| S | Denver DST DEN | 0 |
|
| Game Summary (Ralph Jones, NetFL Press)
Brian Westbrook quipped, "It's rough, ya know... When coach picked me up,
I knew I was fated for misery. I mean, I find myself entrenched on the
roster of the league punching bag." Well no kidding, Einstein. TH was bad. Awful. Grotesque. An embarrassment to the league, I dare say. I love football. The stale smell of rancid beer, the sweaty crowd of rabid fans, the cross-eyed and homely cheerleaders trying to incite us to collective ear-drum rupturing noise, the reverberating sound of vicious collisions, the poetic beauty of a laser-guided bullet pass crashing into the receiver's outstretched hands - yes, this is what I live for. This is what I saw today. Kudos to TB for pulling out a kipper snack, topping them and definitively putting on the superior show, but overall, it was quite a frenetic, enjoyable game.
So now the series stands TB leads the all-time series 17-13 against TH. TB has a 9-3 regular season record (1-1 in this year's playoffs). TH has a 2-10 regular season record. The latest (what I shall laughingly call a) contest saw TB pulverizing TH like a mink that suddenly finds that a family of mice has taken up residence in her den 38-31 in front of a jeering and hostile crowd.
Things went very well for the TB squad particularly on the offensive side of the ball last week as they racked up a combined 291 points, 183 on offense and 108 on defense. Willie Parker with 31 points on offense and Jonathan Vilma with 15 points on defense were the top scorers. All that aside, the most incompetant player of the game goes to Ryan Tucker. Some players need a bit more instruction than others. I've tried a few less orthodox teaching tools from time to time..."
Says Ryan Tucker, dragging around a cart full of dirty laundry, "Coach says he'll find a use for me in this system if it kills us both. Yo, just gimme a little slack, man. But this, goin' from starter not even to the bench... I'm bein' disrespected!"
Maurice Jones-Drew added, "I ain't sayin' nothin'... OK, maybe just a little. Dude's even worse here than on the field. Starching everyone's straps? Using so much bleach it dissolves the danged cotton? I'm almost at the point where I want to go into Coach's doghouse just so I can get some properly handled laundry!"
"Dem's fightin' woids!": Fuel was added to the fire during the two teams' post game news conferences. Tim Marshall grumbled, "Like 'em? No... not really. I'd rather strangle puppies in front of a dozen orphans than pull that wretched owner of theirs out of a burning building." In response, the TH coach stated, "Gosh... why are you even wasting my time looking for a comment about them? They're kinda like cockroaches - to be sure, they occasionally crawl out of the woodwork to be seen by all, but usually, they're lurking somewhere out of sight." |
