Boxscore
| Game Summary (Earl Schmidt, NetFL Press) I get paid very well doing something I usually enjoy. There are, however, occasional games that I only report on under silent protest. Let me begin by being brutally honest. SC is quite the revolting team, wholly outclassed in all aspects of the game by WLR. revolting. That word does not even begin to describe the game I saw today. Despite the ambient weather, I found myself looking upon the cold, dark, windswept gridiron of my soul, agonizing for three gut-wrenching hours as my eyes were forced to witness the utter lack of skill exhibited by SC on this particular day. By the end of the opening kickoff, I could already feel the nausea, the lurching in my stomach. By the end of the first quarter, I began to contemplate gnawing off my own leg to escape. My tears flowed as freely as the cheap beer consumed by the semi-sentients surrounding me, not for the defeated, but for the death of all that I thought was good and pure about football. A.J. Hawk blathered, "Whoa... we got our backends handed to us today and that's for sure. Coach is steering us toward a high draft pick and a wasted season. I can only hope that he trades me to someone capable of winning before my career ends." Randy Moss droned, 'There's really no way that you can shut them down.We had to resort to some... dubious tactics to stay in the game at all. You don't want to see anyone get hurt seriously, but this defense of ours is different. We're coming to hit, we're coming to hurt. When we get the chance to deliver the punch, we are going to try to knock people out... now if only our opponents occasionally noticed, eh?" WLR prostrated SC as though the unfortunate loser were a snail dropped in a jar of saline solution, overcoming their foes by the tune of 19-0 in front of a jeering and hostile crowd. WLR leads the all-time series 10-4 against SC. WLR has a 8-4 regular season record (0-1 in this year's playoffs). SC has a 3-9 regular season record. Things went very well for the WLR squad particularly on the defensive side of the ball last week as they racked up a combined 268 points, 139 on offense and 129 on defense. Dallas Clark with 20 points on offense and Kerry Rhodes with 14 points on defense were the top scorers. However, they were far from perfect. Said Coach/GM Joe Rupp, "Sure, I'm a bit concerned about a few things.. For one, DeAngelo Hall was clearly showing some ill-effects from his intestinal parasite. That procedure he had a couple weeks back... labotomy, I think Doc said - well, that thing has done wonders for his game. He just stands in there and takes it now - play after play after play. No more of this whining about being too hurt. Doc is brilliant, I say. As for those DST? They were utterly incompetent, gaining absolutely nothing instead of playing. Overall though, the as voted on by his teammates, the most worthless player in this game was D'Qwell Jackson. There's no love lost between these two clubs. Joe Rupp groaned, "They stink, not in that 'festering sewage inside a porta-potty next to a dead, bloated cow floating in a culvert' way, but more in the 'the Vienna Boy's Choir has more football talent' way." In response, the SC coach stated, "Who? Do they even play professional football?" | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||