| Off | Def | Total | Score |
|---|
| Away | The Spanish Inquisition | 162 | 124 | 286 | 22 | | Home | Southside Salamanders | 214 | 118 | 332 | 45 |
| Southside Salamanders |
The Spanish Inquisition |
|---|
| I | Aaron Rodgers QB GB | 0 |
| S | Brett Favre QB GB | 11 |
| S | Todd Bouman QB ??? | 0 |
| I | David Carr QB HOU | 0 |
| I | Quinton Porter QB ??? | 0 |
| I | Sage Rosenfels QB HOU | 0 |
| S | Ingle Martin QB GB | 0 |
| I | John Wade OC TB | 0 |
| S | Scott Wells OC/OG GB | 10 |
| I | Ruben Brown OG CHI | 0 |
| I | Bennie Anderson OG MIA | 0 |
| S | Mike Goff OG LAC | 14 |
| S | Todd Weiner OT ATL | 2 |
| I | Kwame Harris OT SF | 0 |
| S | Tra Thomas OT PHI | 11 |
| S | Jake Scott OG IND | 12 |
| S | Frank Gore RB SF | 30 |
| B | Ahman Green RB GB | 3 |
| I | Jerome Harrison RB CLE | 0 |
| I | Greg Jennings WR GB | 0 |
| B | Reggie Brown WR PHI | 2 |
| S | Reggie Wayne WR IND | 7 |
| S | Desmond Clark TE CHI | 19 |
| B | George Wrighster TE JAC | 4 |
| S | Kellen Winslow TE CLE | 12 |
| B | Joe Klopfenstein TE LAR | 4 |
| S | Chris Cooley TE WAS | 38 |
| B | Reggie Kelly TE CIN | 3 |
| I | Owen Daniels TE HOU | 0 |
| S | Rian Lindell K BUF | 22 |
| I | Matt Bryant K TB | 0 |
| S | Oakland OST LV | 6 |
| I | Grant Wistrom DE SEA | 0 |
| I | Greg Ellis DE DAL | 0 |
| S | Kelly Gregg NT BAL | 5 |
| S | Dwight Freeney DE IND | 3 |
| S | Lance Briggs OLB CHI | 9 |
| S | Keith Bulluck OLB TEN | 7 |
| B | Ryan Nece OLB TB | 0 |
| S | Scott Shanle ILB NO | 7 |
| I | Chad Greenway OLB ??? | 0 |
| B | Daryl Smith OLB JAC | 2 |
| B | Manny Lawson OLB SF | 2 |
| I | Barry Gardner ILB ??? | 0 |
| I | Andra Davis ILB CLE | 0 |
| S | Larry Foote ILB PIT | 5 |
| B | D.J. Williams OLB DEN | 0 |
| B | Brady Poppinga LB GB | 2 |
| B | Kelly Herndon CB SEA | 3 |
| B | Sheldon Brown CB PHI | 1 |
| S | Rashean Mathis CB JAC | 5 |
| S | Alex Brown DE CHI | 1 |
| I | Corey Webster CB NYG | 0 |
| B | Jason David CB IND | 3 |
| S | Daven Holly CB CLE | 18 |
| S | Sean Jones S CLE | 17 |
| S | Stuart Schweigert S LV | 7 |
| B | Daniel Bullocks S DET | 1 |
| B | C.C. Brown S HOU | 4 |
| B | Mike McKenzie CB NO | 0 |
| B | Nick Collins S GB | 3 |
| I | Jason Allen DB MIA | 0 |
| I | Craig Hentrich P TEN | 0 |
| S | Derrick Frost P WAS | 8 |
| S | Cincinnati DST CIN | 5 |
|
| S | Donovan McNabb QB PHI | 0 |
| S | A.J. Feeley QB PHI | 0 |
| I | Kerry Collins QB TEN | 0 |
| I | Vince Young QB TEN | 0 |
| S | Jeff Garcia QB PHI | 22 |
| I | Jeff Hartings OC PIT | 0 |
| I | Mike Flynn OC BAL | 0 |
| S | Jamar Nesbit OC/OG NO | 10 |
| S | Todd Herremans OG/OT PHI | 11 |
| S | Ryan Cook OC MIN | 1 |
| S | Todd Steussie OG/OT LAR | 13 |
| I | Vernon Carey OT MIA | 0 |
| I | Jon Ogden OT BAL | 0 |
| I | Mike Rosenthal OT MIN | 0 |
| I | Mark Setterstrom OG LAR | 0 |
| S | Jordan Black OT KC | 6 |
| I | Shaud Williams RB BUF | 0 |
| S | LaDainian Tomlinson RB LAC | 17 |
| B | Travis Henry RB TEN | 4 |
| B | Michael Turner RB LAC | 1 |
| S | Willis McGahee RB BUF | 23 |
| B | Michael Bennett RB KC | 0 |
| B | Cedrick Wilson WR PIT | 1 |
| B | Nate Burleson WR SEA | 0 |
| S | Joey Galloway WR TB | 5 |
| I | Darrell Jackson WR SEA | 0 |
| B | Marcus Pollard TE DET | 0 |
| S | Jeremy Shockey TE NYG | 6 |
| S | Antonio Gates TE LAC | 18 |
| I | Olindo Mare K MIA | 0 |
| S | John Carney K NO | 13 |
| S | San Francisco OST SF | 11 |
| S | Will Smith DE NO | 2 |
| B | Brett Keisel DE PIT | 2 |
| I | Tommie Harris DT CHI | 0 |
| S | Chartric Darby DT SEA | 2 |
| S | Larry Tripplett DT BUF | 3 |
| B | Trevor Pryce DE BAL | 1 |
| B | Ian Gold OLB DEN | 2 |
| S | Aaron Schobel DE BUF | 6 |
| S | Ben Leber OLB MIN | 9 |
| S | Napoleon Harris OLB MIN | 3 |
| B | Gary Brackett MLB IND | 5 |
| B | Edgerton Hartwell MLB ATL | 6 |
| S | Thomas Howard LB LV | 7 |
| B | David Macklin CB ARI | 0 |
| S | Antoine Winfield CB MIN | 19 |
| B | Andre Dyson CB NYJ | 1 |
| B | Sammy Knight S KC | 5 |
| B | Mark Roman S SF | 2 |
| B | Donte Whitner S BUF | 7 |
| B | Lawyer Milloy S ATL | 5 |
| S | Ed Reed S BAL | 15 |
| I | Travis Fisher CB LAR | 0 |
| S | Will Allen CB MIA | 3 |
| S | Keith Lewis S SF | 8 |
| I | Ryan Plackemeier P SEA | 0 |
| S | Chris Kluwe P MIN | 9 |
| S | Dallas DST DAL | 2 |
|
| Game Summary (Ralph Jones, NetFL Press)
If Jeff Garcia's body of work exemplifies the high-point of your weekend, you know that you're on the losing end of a sordid, sick joke of a game. Words utterly fail to describe this romp into the realms of ineptitude. When Chekhov saw the long winter, he saw a winter bleak and dark and bereft of hope. Standing here in the garish, filth-ridden stands of this now-empty stadium after the game, I got to thinking - such is truly the fate of both fans of the TSI squad. In the end, this team is just hopeless.
And so now it stands that SRS leads the all-time series 9-0 against TSI. SRS has a 12-0 regular season record (2-0 in this year's playoffs) having just won the Superbowl. TSI has a 7-5 regular season record (2-1 in this year's playoffs) having just lost the Superbowl. The latest (what I shall laughingly call a) contest saw SRS has senselessly deluged TSI as though the unfortunate loser were a snail dropped in a jar of saline solution 45-22 in front of a jeering and hostile crowd.
Things went very well for the SRS squad particularly on the offensive side of the ball last week as they racked up a combined 332 points, 214 on offense and 118 on defense. Frank Gore with 30 points on offense and Ryan Nece with 0 points on defense were the top scorers. Mistakes dampened the mood around the locker room somewhat. Said Coach/GM Allen Cummings, "Sure, I'm a bit concerned about a few things.. For one, Ryan Nece kinda languished a bit out there. I've been working with Doc on a revolutionary new procedure... I won't go into the full details right now, but let's just say that he won't have an any excuse for dropping the damned ball anymore. As for those OC? They were utterly incompetent, gaining absolutely nothing while taking the day off. Overall though, the Doc's been looking into a revolutionary new surgery - replace his hands with anything - stickum, chicken claws, even bricks would be an improvement. I mean, he drops balls as if they were live ferrets. in this game was Ryan Nece. His terrible effort yielded a month in the doghouse.
Though the game was already decided on the field, apparently neither team was done. Allen Cummings quipped, "That owner of theirs kinda reminds me of a Matt Millen and Michael Jackson hybrid... all bluster, melting face, questionable personal tastes... not exactly the kind of person I'd invite to my child's birthday party." In response, the TSI coach considered this when he said, "I'm not saying that this is true, mind you, but I'm not saying it isn't. I heard tell that that owner of theirs has been kidnapping small children and selling them on the Chinese black market. Do I respect him? Does anyone?" |
