Boxscore
| Game Summary (Earl Schmidt, NetFL Press) I get paid very well doing something I usually enjoy. There are, however, occasional games that I only report on under silent protest. Let me begin by being brutally honest. DS is quite the awful team, wholly outclassed in all aspects of the game by WLR. "You want fries with that?" Yep, we'll be hearing that from Derrick Frost in the near-future after this week's performance. After a time, I began to play a game, counting the seconds between mistakes, waiting with giddy excitement while seeing that head coach of theirs as enraged as an elementary school janitor fresh out of Vomit-be-Gone. Steve Smith considered this when he said, "We had a chance at the beginning, man. We hung in there through the opening kickoff. We fought, but after that, we just didn't get her done. It's a bit disappointing, to be sure." Derrick Frost considered this when he said, "Word up... I ain't showed nothin' today 'cuz dey wuz cheating. No, I ain't sayin' dat... les jus say dat if the refs had any guts, dey woulda been throwin' their little yellow hankies all over 'round me. Da way I was disrespected out there was sick, dude." WLR has beaten DS as though they were naught but a group of frenchmen on the battlefield, crushing them by the tune of 43-0 in front of a jeering and hostile crowd. WLR leads the all-time series 5-3 against DS. WLR has a 3-1 regular season record. DS has a 0-4 regular season record. Things went very well for the WLR squad particularly on the defensive side of the ball last week as they racked up a combined 333 points, 171 on offense and 162 on defense. Steven Jackson with 28 points on offense and James Harrison with 20 points on defense were the top scorers. Several mental breakdowns drew the coach's ire. Said Coach/GM Joe Rupp, "I took exception to our execution on a few plays.. For one, Brandon Moore was as sharp as a sponge today. Doc says that he secretes some sort of viscous slime from his arms when he gets hot. This in turn makes the ball, his uniform, his hands, whatever - kinda slick. If you look at many of his 3789 miscues over the year, you can see that often times, nobody even touches him and he falls down, the ball slips out of his hands, or he misfires on a play. As for those DST? They showed all the football grace of ballerinas as they filled the record book with 1 Punt returns defended, 9 Defended punt return yardage, 9 Defended punt return average, 4 Defended kickoff returns, 122 Defended kickoff return yardage, 30.5 Defended kickoff return average over the course of the contest. Overall though, the team goat in this game was Travis LaBoy. "Dem's fightin' woids!": Fuel was added to the fire during the two teams' post game news conferences. Joe Rupp shot, "Let's see... something nice to say? Well, they're not the most repugnant team out there, but that's kinda like saying that Shockey isn't as annoying as that Owens clown." In response, the DS coach shot, "Who? I didn't realize they were still in the league." | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||