| Off | Def | Total | Score |
|---|
| Away | Southside Salamanders | 212 | 135 | 347 | 45 | | Home | Demonic Hordes | 150 | 122 | 272 | 8 |
| Demonic Hordes |
Southside Salamanders |
|---|
| I | Todd Collins QB ??? | 0 |
| S | Donovan McNabb QB PHI | 20 |
| S | A.J. Feeley QB ??? | 0 |
| S | Kevin Kolb QB PHI | 0 |
| I | Colt Brennan QB ??? | 0 |
| I | Jason Campbell QB WAS | 0 |
| S | Jonathan Goodwin OC/OG NO | 7 |
| S | Anthony Herrera OG ??? | 4 |
| S | Kris Dielman OG ??? | 3 |
| I | Mike Brisiel OG HOU | 0 |
| I | Eugene Amano OG ??? | 0 |
| I | Ryan Tucker OG/OT ??? | 0 |
| I | Ryan Harris OT DEN | 0 |
| S | Mark Tauscher OT GB | 10 |
| S | David Stewart OT TEN | 5 |
| B | Leonard Weaver FB SEA | 1 |
| B | Mike Tolbert FB LAC | 1 |
| B | Willis McGahee RB BAL | 2 |
| I | Jamaal Charles RB KC | 0 |
| S | Jerious Norwood RB ATL | 6 |
| I | Leon Washington RB NYJ | 0 |
| B | Andre Hall RB DEN | 2 |
| I | Devin Thomas WR WAS | 0 |
| B | Ike Hilliard WR TB | 4 |
| S | Anthony Gonzalez WR IND | 1 |
| S | Wes Welker WR NE | 18 |
| B | Donald Driver WR GB | 5 |
| S | Kevin Boss TE NYG | 18 |
| B | Robert Royal TE BUF | 2 |
| B | Marcedes Lewis TE JAC | 3 |
| S | Tony Scheffler TE DEN | 20 |
| S | Rob Bironas K TEN | 10 |
| I | Olindo Mare K SEA | 0 |
| I | Carolina OST CAR | 0 |
| S | San Francisco OST SF | 4 |
| S | Stylez White DE TB | 2 |
| S | Justin Tuck DE NYG | 6 |
| I | Leonard Little DE LAR | 0 |
| S | Vince Wilfork NT NE | 4 |
| B | Anthony Spencer OLB DAL | 3 |
| I | Osi Umenyiora OLB ??? | 0 |
| S | Chad Greenway OLB MIN | 8 |
| B | Clint Session OLB IND | 3 |
| I | Tyjuan Hagler OLB IND | 0 |
| S | Karlos Dansby ILB ARI | 11 |
| B | Tim Dobbins ILB LAC | 3 |
| B | Zach Thomas ILB DAL | 2 |
| B | Takeo Spikes OLB SF | 10 |
| S | Jerod Mayo ILB NE | 2 |
| I | Leon Williams ILB CLE | 0 |
| B | David Herron OLB MIN | 1 |
| S | Leroy Hill OLB SEA | 9 |
| S | Antonio Cromartie CB LAC | 8 |
| S | Carlos Rogers CB WAS | 4 |
| B | Corey Webster CB NYG | 2 |
| B | Brandon Flowers CB KC | 3 |
| B | Leon Hall CB CIN | 3 |
| I | Adrian Wilson S ARI | 0 |
| S | Marvin White S CIN | 4 |
| I | Sean Jones S CLE | 0 |
| S | Yeremiah Bell S MIA | 8 |
| S | Mike Scifres P LAC | 25 |
| S | New York (N) DST NYG | 1 |
|
| I | J.P. Losman QB BUF | 0 |
| S | Aaron Rodgers QB GB | 42 |
| I | Trent Edwards QB BUF | 0 |
| S | Matt Flynn QB GB | 0 |
| S | Brian Brohm QB ??? | 0 |
| I | Gibran Hamdan QB ??? | 0 |
| S | Scott Wells OC/OG GB | 10 |
| I | Dennis Norman OC/OG ??? | 0 |
| S | Mike Goff OG LAC | 4 |
| S | Chris Kuper OG DEN | 12 |
| I | Josh Sitton OG ??? | 0 |
| S | Duane Brown OT HOU | 17 |
| S | Tra Thomas OT ??? | 10 |
| I | Michael Roos OT TEN | 0 |
| I | Jake Scott OG TEN | 0 |
| S | Reggie Bush RB NO | 20 |
| S | Frank Gore RB SF | 21 |
| B | Chris Perry RB CIN | 3 |
| B | Chris Johnson RB TEN | 3 |
| B | Fred Jackson RB BUF | 3 |
| B | Vincent Jackson WR LAC | 3 |
| I | Drew Carter WR ??? | 0 |
| S | Brandon Marshall WR DEN | 11 |
| B | James Jones WR GB | 1 |
| B | Laurent Robinson WR ATL | 0 |
| I | Jason Carter WR ??? | 0 |
| B | Sidney Rice WR MIN | 0 |
| S | Greg Jennings WR GB | 24 |
| B | Delanie Walker TE SF | 3 |
| I | Kellen Winslow TE CLE | 0 |
| S | Brent Celek TE PHI | 9 |
| I | Dustin Keller TE NYJ | 0 |
| I | John Carney K NYG | 0 |
| S | Mason Crosby K GB | 8 |
| S | Green Bay OST GB | 8 |
| S | Randy Starks NT MIA | 0 |
| B | Ray McDonald DE SF | 4 |
| I | Kelly Gregg DL ??? | 0 |
| S | Dwight Freeney DE IND | 11 |
| B | Danny Clark OLB NYG | 2 |
| S | Keith Bulluck OLB TEN | 15 |
| I | Manny Lawson OLB SF | 0 |
| B | Matt Wilhelm ILB LAC | 3 |
| B | Bryan Kehl OLB NYG | 1 |
| S | Channing Crowder ILB MIA | 5 |
| S | Bart Scott ILB BAL | 6 |
| S | Omar Gaither OLB PHI | 7 |
| I | David Harris ILB NYJ | 0 |
| B | Hunter Hillenmeyer OLB CHI | 1 |
| S | Alex Brown DE CHI | 10 |
| S | Rashean Mathis CB JAC | 16 |
| B | Antoine Cason CB LAC | 3 |
| S | Brent Grimes CB ATL | 6 |
| B | Brian Russell S SEA | 4 |
| S | Daniel Bullocks S DET | 11 |
| S | Jarrad Page S KC | 7 |
| I | Chinedum Ndukwe S CIN | 0 |
| B | Atari Bigby S GB | 0 |
| B | Aaron Rouse S GB | 0 |
| I | Darrelle Revis CB NYJ | 0 |
| I | Brandon McDonald CB CLE | 0 |
| I | Brandon Fields P MIA | 0 |
| S | Brett Kern P DEN | 15 |
| S | Tampa Bay DST TB | 8 |
|
| Game Summary (Ralph Jones, NetFL Press)
"You want fries with that?" Yep, we'll be hearing that from Adrian Wilson in the near-future after this week's performance. After a time, I began to play a game, counting the seconds between mistakes, waiting with giddy excitement while seeing that head coach of theirs as enraged as an elementary school janitor fresh out of Vomit-be-Gone.
And so now it stands that SRS trails the all-time series 6-11 against DH. SRS has a 5-0 regular season record. DH has a 4-1 regular season record. The latest (what I shall laughingly call a) contest saw SRS has beaten DH like a bloated spider engorging on the tender underbelly of a common house fly 45-8 in front of a despondent home crowd.
Things went very well for the SRS squad on both sides of the ball last week as they racked up a combined 347 points, 212 on offense and 135 on defense. Aaron Rodgers with 42 points on offense and Rashean Mathis with 16 points on defense were the top scorers. Things were not all roses, however. Said Coach/GM Allen Cummings, "Sure, I'm a bit concerned about a few things.. For one, Bart Scott played about as well as a frog pithed by an epileptic first-grader. Doc says that he's gotten much better since he's started the electroshock therapy... something about frontal lobes and things with molecular structures. It all sounded very clinical to me, but as long as it keeps him on the field, I'm all for it. As for those OST? They showed all the football grace of ballerinas as they filled the record book with 1 Punt return, 13 Punt return yardage, 13 Punt return average, 5 Kickoff returns, 119 Kickoff return yardage, 23.8 Kickoff return average while taking the day off. Overall though, the Doc's been looking into a revolutionary new surgery - replace his hands with anything - stickum, chicken claws, even bricks would be an improvement. I mean, he drops balls as if they were live ferrets. in this game was Hunter Hillenmeyer. His bad effort yielded a seat alone on the ride home.
There's no love lost between these two clubs. Allen Cummings considered this when he said, "I suppose every league needs a doormat. I feel some degree of scorn for them to be sure, but mostly, I just shake my head and watch them bumble their way from game to game with a sense of detached amusement." In response, the DH coach waxed poetic, stating, "That owner of theirs kinda reminds me of a Matt Millen and Michael Jackson hybrid... all bluster, melting face, questionable personal tastes... not exactly the kind of person I'd invite to my child's birthday party." |
