| Off | Def | Total | Score |
|---|
| Away | WHO DAT | 173 | 92 | 265 | 47 | | Home | Resistance is Futile | 163 | 80 | 243 | 36 |
| Resistance is Futile |
WHO DAT |
|---|
| I | Joe Flacco QB BAL | 0 |
| I | Todd Bouman QB ??? | 0 |
| I | Alex Brink QB ??? | 0 |
| S | Sage Rosenfels QB HOU | 0 |
| S | Matt Schaub QB HOU | 30 |
| I | Kyle Boller QB ??? | 0 |
| I | Troy Smith QB BAL | 0 |
| S | Casey Rabach OC WAS | 5 |
| I | Justin Hartwig OC PIT | 0 |
| I | Bobbie Williams OG CIN | 0 |
| I | Robert Gallery OG LV | 0 |
| S | Justin Smiley OG MIA | 11 |
| S | Arron Sears OG TB | 9 |
| S | Kareem McKenzie OT NYG | 12 |
| I | Jake Long OT MIA | 0 |
| I | Jordan Gross OT ??? | 0 |
| S | Jeremy Trueblood OT TB | 10 |
| B | Chester Taylor RB MIN | 3 |
| B | DeAngelo Williams RB CAR | 2 |
| B | Ricky Williams RB MIA | 5 |
| S | Kevin Smith RB DET | 9 |
| S | Darren McFadden RB LV | 3 |
| S | Devery Henderson WR NO | 9 |
| S | Steve Breaston WR ARI | 28 |
| B | Robert Meachem WR NO | 0 |
| I | Nate Burleson WR SEA | 0 |
| B | Donte' Stallworth WR CLE | 1 |
| B | Ted Ginn WR MIA | 0 |
| I | Lee Evans WR BUF | 0 |
| B | Desmond Clark TE CHI | 5 |
| S | Anthony Fasano TE MIA | 10 |
| I | Randy McMichael TE LAR | 0 |
| B | Anthony Becht TE LAR | 1 |
| S | Stephen Gostkowski K NE | 5 |
| S | Chicago OST CHI | 1 |
| I | Dallas OST DAL | 0 |
| I | Shawne Merriman OLB LAC | 0 |
| I | Chris Kelsay DE BUF | 0 |
| B | Phillip Merling DE MIA | 1 |
| S | Andre Carter DE WAS | 4 |
| B | Tank Johnson NT DAL | 1 |
| B | Jason Ferguson NT MIA | 1 |
| S | Kris Jenkins NT NYJ | 4 |
| S | Adewale Ogunleye DE CHI | 5 |
| I | Kawika Mitchell OLB BUF | 0 |
| S | Parys Haralson OLB SF | 3 |
| I | James Farrior ILB PIT | 0 |
| S | Akin Ayodele ILB MIA | 11 |
| I | Lawrence Timmons ILB PIT | 0 |
| S | Eric Barton ILB NYJ | 5 |
| B | Na'il Diggs OLB CAR | 6 |
| S | Brady Poppinga OLB GB | 2 |
| B | Nathan Vasher CB CHI | 0 |
| S | Adam Jones CB DAL | 5 |
| S | Chris Gamble CB CAR | 7 |
| B | Shawn Springs CB WAS | 3 |
| S | Dexter Jackson S CIN | 0 |
| S | Ken Hamlin S DAL | 7 |
| I | Troy Polamalu S PIT | 0 |
| I | Chris Hope S TEN | 0 |
| I | Matt Turk P HOU | 0 |
| S | Shane Lechler P LV | 12 |
| S | Chicago DST CHI | 3 |
| I | Dallas DST DAL | 0 |
|
| S | Brett Favre QB NYJ | 24 |
| I | Carson Palmer QB CIN | 0 |
| S | Kellen Clemens QB NYJ | 0 |
| I | Jordan Palmer QB CIN | 0 |
| S | Brett Ratliff QB ??? | 0 |
| I | Ryan Fitzpatrick QB CIN | 0 |
| I | Matt Birk OC MIN | 0 |
| S | Jeremy Zuttah OC ??? | 0 |
| S | Todd McClure OC ??? | 8 |
| S | Ben Grubbs OG BAL | 2 |
| I | Brad Butler OG BUF | 0 |
| S | Kevin Shaffer OT CLE | 0 |
| I | Branden Albert OT KC | 0 |
| S | Adam Terry OT BAL | 0 |
| S | Matt Forte RB CHI | 26 |
| I | Kevin Jones RB CHI | 0 |
| B | Michael Pittman RB DEN | 5 |
| S | Thomas Jones RB NYJ | 31 |
| B | Michael Bush RB LV | 1 |
| S | Calvin Johnson WR DET | 15 |
| B | David Patten WR NO | 0 |
| B | Johnnie Lee Higgins WR LV | 1 |
| B | Bobby Wade WR MIN | 2 |
| B | Hank Baskett WR PHI | 4 |
| I | Kevin Curtis WR PHI | 0 |
| S | T.J. Houshmandzadeh WR CIN | 14 |
| B | Arnaz Battle WR SF | 2 |
| S | Jerricho Cotchery WR NYJ | 19 |
| I | Josh Reed WR BUF | 0 |
| B | Brandon Stokley WR DEN | 3 |
| S | Kris Brown K HOU | 13 |
| S | Washington OST WAS | 3 |
| B | Lawrence Jackson DE SEA | 1 |
| B | Kendall Langford DE MIA | 2 |
| S | Craig Terrill DT SEA | 5 |
| S | La'Roi Glover DT LAR | 3 |
| I | Kyle Williams DT BUF | 0 |
| I | Ryan Denney DE BUF | 0 |
| B | Vernon Gholston OLB NYJ | 0 |
| S | Thomas Davis OLB CAR | 6 |
| B | Jo-Lonn Dunbar LB NO | 1 |
| S | Adalius Thomas OLB NE | 2 |
| S | Robert Mathis DE IND | 26 |
| B | Jamie Winborn OLB DEN | 1 |
| I | Mark Simoneau MLB ??? | 0 |
| S | Antonio Pierce MLB NYG | 5 |
| S | Derrick Burgess DE LV | 0 |
| I | Demorrio Williams OLB KC | 0 |
| B | Sam Madison CB NYG | 0 |
| S | David Barrett CB NYJ | 1 |
| I | Brandon Carr CB KC | 0 |
| I | Ashton Youboty CB BUF | 0 |
| B | Aqib Talib CB TB | 5 |
| S | Rodney Harrison S NE | 4 |
| B | Michael Huff S LV | 2 |
| S | Marlin Jackson CB IND | 7 |
| S | Lawyer Milloy S ATL | 1 |
| B | Chris Horton S WAS | 8 |
| S | Mat McBriar P DAL | 12 |
| I | Dave Zastudil P CLE | 0 |
| I | Saint Louis DST LAR | 0 |
| S | Houston DST HOU | 0 |
|
| Game Summary (Ralph Jones, NetFL Press)
Matt Schaub waxed poetic, stating, "We had a chance at the beginning, man. We hung in there through the opening kickoff. We fought, but after that, we just didn't get her done. It's a bit disappointing, to be sure." Well no kidding, Einstein. KIR was bad. Awful. Grotesque. An embarrassment to the league, I dare say. "You want fries with that?" Yep, we'll be hearing that from Jason Ferguson in the near-future after this week's performance. After a time, I began to play a game, counting the seconds between mistakes, waiting with giddy excitement while seeing that head coach of theirs as angry as an animal rights activist stumbling into an NRA convention.
So now the series stands LLL leads the all-time series 1-0 against KIR. LLL has a 4-2 regular season record. KIR has a 0-6 regular season record. The latest (what I shall laughingly call a) contest saw LLL has senselessly deluged KIR as though the unfortunate loser were a snail dropped in a jar of saline solution 47-36 in front of a despondent home crowd.
They were almost perfect on the LLL squad even though they did not excel on either side of the ball last week as they racked up a combined 265 points, 173 on offense and 92 on defense. Thomas Jones with 31 points on offense and Robert Mathis with 26 points on defense were the top scorers. All that aside, Doc's been looking into a revolutionary new surgery - replace his hands with anything - stickum, chicken claws, even bricks would be an improvement. I mean, he drops balls as if they were live ferrets. of the game goes to Kevin Jones. I've come up with a
motivational plan for every player I deem to be failing to live up to their potential..."
Says Kevin Jones, pouring out of a far-too-tight yellow bikini, "I have nothing to say about this."
Matt Birk added, "Words fail me... got it? I ain't had a single night's sleep since coach made that call last Monday, man. I keep waking up screaming. I mean dang, man... time to put some time on the thigh-master."
There's no love lost between these two clubs. Scott Lawrence said, "Oh, they're harmless... a bit annoying too, I guess... Kinda remind me of Barney or Big Bird..." In response, the KIR coach grumbled, "I feel kinda sorry for them, to be honest. I mean, how can you be that inept, that pitiable? I guess they occasionally get my blood flowing, but for the most part, playing them is about as exciting as rearranging my sock drawer." |
