Boxscore
| Game Summary (Earl Schmidt, NetFL Press) When I was a young lad, I once tossed my sister's Barbie doll collection into a corn thrasher. My father, as apoplectic as a TV evangelist being audited by the IRS, told me to retrieve our self-help electroshock therapy kit. He then hauled me into a cave and placated the natives with my pain. To this day, I still wet my pants whenever I think of that memory. I bring this up because the similarities between what happened to me then and what happened to AW today are the same. DH overwhelming AW as though they were naught but a group of frenchmen on the battlefield, blitzing them by the tune of 54-24 in front of a jeering and hostile crowd. DH leads the all-time series 1-0 against AW. DH has a 5-2 regular season record. AW has a 5-2 regular season record. Owen Daniels considered this when he said, "We know it's going to be a hard-fought game when we play these clowns - tough, physical... It's important to win the physical football games because you put so much into it. We didn't do that today. Every time I looked up, I heard the crowd and I figured it was another turnover. It's tough to lose when you've worked all week. Mentally, you have to let it go." Jay Richardson said, "Das why I get paid da big bucks, dawg! Ooh baby I was hot out there! Now if only dey woulda gotten me in on some plays we'da been breakin' scoring records and stuff! Offense, defense... don' matter to numba me... just wish them others around me would understand my value." Things went very well for the DH squad on both sides of the ball last week as they racked up a combined 325 points, 196 on offense and 129 on defense. Jason Campbell with 23 points on offense and Justin Tuck with 16 points on defense were the top scorers. However, they were far from perfect. Said Coach/GM Raman Ohri, "We had a few breakdowns. . For one, Carlos Rogers was as sharp as a sponge today. His bones are made of flubber, so I don't think that's the problem. At least I wouldn't call that a break per se. Still, he's too much of a little baby to play with that little bruise. Broken vertabrae? I doubt that very much. It's clear who is here just to collect a check and frankly, I won't forget it. As for those OST? They were utterly incompetent, gaining 3 Punt return, 3 Punt return yardage, 1.5 Punt return average, 6 Kickoff returns, 115 Kickoff return yardage, 19.167 Kickoff return average while taking the day off. Overall though, the the most incompetant player in this game was Ike Hilliard. His horrible effort yielded as many positives as a hydrogen ion. Some players need a bit more instruction than others. I've tried a few less orthodox teaching tools from time to time..." Says Ike Hilliard, pouring out of a far-too-tight yellow bikini, "I have nothing to say about this." Mike Brisiel added, "Words fail me... got it? I ain't had a single night's sleep since coach made that call last Monday, man. I keep waking up screaming. I mean dang, man... time to put some time on the thigh-master." Though the game was already decided on the field, apparently neither team was done. Raman Ohri stated, "Let's see... something nice to say? Well, they're not the most repugnant team out there, but that's kinda like saying that Shockey isn't as annoying as that Owens clown." In response, the AW coach waxed poetic, stating, "Let's see... something nice to say? Well, they're not the most repugnant team out there, but that's kinda like saying that Shockey isn't as annoying as that Owens clown." | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||