Boxscore
| Game Summary (Earl Schmidt, NetFL Press) I get paid very well doing something I usually enjoy. There are, however, occasional games that I only report on under silent protest. Let me begin by being brutally honest. TSI is quite the pathetic team, wholly outclassed in all aspects of the game by PC. "You want fries with that?" Yep, we'll be hearing that from Rob Meier in the near-future after this week's performance. After a time, I began to play a game, counting the seconds between mistakes, waiting with giddy excitement while seeing that head coach of theirs as enraged as an elementary school janitor fresh out of Vomit-be-Gone. Jeff Garcia whined, "They came at us with some tough schemes, but we were able to put a few decent plays together. I think we can move the ball against anyone, stop anyone and we just didn't execute today." Rob Meier whined, "Das why I get paid da big bucks, dawg! Ooh baby I was hot out there! Now if only dey woulda gotten me in on some plays we'da been breakin' scoring records and stuff! Offense, defense... don' matter to numba me... just wish them others around me would understand my value." PC bludgeoning TSI as though they were naught but a group of frenchmen on the battlefield, maiming their egos by the tune of 55-38 in front of a despondent home crowd. PC trails the all-time series 1-7 against TSI. PC has a 6-3 regular season record. TSI has a 5-4 regular season record. They were almost perfect on the PC squad particularly on the offensive side of the ball last week as they racked up a combined 290 points, 189 on offense and 101 on defense. Kurt Warner with 47 points on offense and Barrett Ruud with 15 points on defense were the top scorers. Mistakes dampened the mood around the locker room somewhat. Said Coach/GM Glenn Good, "I took exception to our execution on a few plays.. For one, Elvis Dumervil performed like a spasmodic violinist. I've been working with Doc on a revolutionary new procedure... I won't go into the full details right now, but let's just say that he won't have an any excuse for dropping the damned ball anymore. As for those DST? They showed all the football grace of ballerinas as they filled the record book with 7 Defended kickoff returns, 184 Defended kickoff return yardage, 26.286 Defended kickoff return average throughout the course of their pitiful performance. Overall though, the as voted on by his teammates, the most worthless player in this game was Jacob Bell. "Dem's fightin' woids!": Fuel was added to the fire during the two teams' post game news conferences. Glenn Good groaned, "That owner of theirs kinda reminds me of a Matt Millen and Michael Jackson hybrid... all bluster, melting face, questionable personal tastes... not exactly the kind of person I'd invite to my child's birthday party." In response, the TSI coach considered this when he said, "Gosh... why are you even wasting my time looking for a comment about them? They're kinda like cockroaches - to be sure, they occasionally crawl out of the woodwork to be seen by all, but usually, they're lurking somewhere out of sight." | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||