| Off | Def | Total | Score |
|---|
| Away | For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge | 195 | 96 | 291 | 52 | | Home | Rock N Rollers | 165 | 91 | 256 | 35 |
| Rock N Rollers |
For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge |
|---|
| I | Jon Kitna QB DET | 0 |
| S | Trent Green QB LAR | 0 |
| I | Dan Orlovsky QB DET | 0 |
| I | Drew Stanton QB DET | 0 |
| S | Brock Berlin QB LAR | 0 |
| S | Marc Bulger QB LAR | 28 |
| S | Shaun O'Hara OC ??? | 13 |
| I | Andre Gurode OC DAL | 0 |
| S | Cory Procter OC/OG DAL | 0 |
| I | Eric Steinbach OG ??? | 0 |
| I | Vince Manuwai OG ??? | 0 |
| I | Marshal Yanda OG/OT BAL | 0 |
| S | Willie Colon OT PIT | 5 |
| S | Ike Ndukwe OL MIA | 11 |
| I | Damion McIntosh OG/OT KC | 0 |
| S | Mike Gandy OT ARI | 8 |
| I | Tony Moll OG/OT GB | 0 |
| I | Larry Johnson RB KC | 0 |
| B | Derrick Ward RB NYG | 4 |
| I | Julius Jones RB SEA | 0 |
| S | Steve Slaton RB HOU | 20 |
| S | Maurice Morris RB SEA | 14 |
| B | Rashied Davis WR CHI | 2 |
| S | Kevin Walter WR HOU | 12 |
| B | Bryant Johnson WR SF | 4 |
| B | Demetrius Williams WR BAL | 0 |
| B | Antwaan Randle El WR WAS | 1 |
| S | Chad Johnson WR CIN | 8 |
| B | Steve Smith WR NYG | 1 |
| B | Javon Walker WR LV | 0 |
| B | Domenik Hixon WR NYG | 2 |
| S | Jeff King TE CAR | 25 |
| B | Tony Curtis TE DAL | 0 |
| B | Jerame Tuman TE ARI | 0 |
| I | Ben Utecht TE CIN | 0 |
| I | Dan Campbell TE DET | 0 |
| S | Robbie Gould K CHI | 3 |
| I | Kansas City OST KC | 0 |
| S | San Diego OST LAC | 0 |
| S | Antonio Smith DE ARI | 9 |
| I | Patrick Kerney DE SEA | 0 |
| S | Marcus Stroud DT BUF | 7 |
| S | Kevin Williams DT MIN | 2 |
| B | Tommy Kelly DT LV | 5 |
| I | Kenyon Coleman DE NYJ | 0 |
| S | D.D. Lewis OLB SEA | 1 |
| S | Jarret Johnson OLB BAL | 6 |
| S | Tamba Hali DE KC | 0 |
| I | Jordon Dizon OLB DET | 0 |
| S | Paris Lenon MLB DET | 11 |
| B | D.J. Williams OLB DEN | 0 |
| B | Mike Peterson MLB JAC | 3 |
| S | Charles Tillman CB CHI | 6 |
| B | Nnamdi Asomugha CB LV | 2 |
| B | Terrence McGee CB BUF | 7 |
| B | Clinton Hart S LAC | 4 |
| S | Quintin Mikell S PHI | 6 |
| S | Michael Lewis S SF | 13 |
| B | Mike McKenzie CB NO | 0 |
| S | Jordan Babineaux DB SEA | 8 |
| S | Josh Bidwell P TB | 1 |
| I | Michael Koenen P ATL | 0 |
| S | Seattle DST SEA | 0 |
|
| S | Mark Brunell QB ??? | 0 |
| I | Eli Manning QB NYG | 0 |
| I | David Carr QB NYG | 0 |
| S | Drew Brees QB NO | 30 |
| S | Joey Harrington QB ??? | 0 |
| S | Jason Spitz OC/OG GB | 16 |
| I | Leroy Harris OC/OG ??? | 0 |
| S | Jeromey Clary OT LAC | 8 |
| S | Jahri Evans OG NO | 11 |
| S | Chris Spencer OC SEA | 3 |
| I | Joe Staley OT SF | 0 |
| I | Shawn Andrews OT ??? | 0 |
| I | Chad Clifton OT GB | 0 |
| S | Ryan Clady OT DEN | 9 |
| S | Jamal Lewis RB CLE | 8 |
| I | Jerome Harrison RB CLE | 0 |
| I | Jalen Parmele RB BAL | 0 |
| B | Justin Gage WR TEN | 8 |
| S | Marques Colston WR NO | 7 |
| B | Donnie Avery WR LAR | 5 |
| I | Miles Austin WR DAL | 0 |
| B | Lance Moore WR NO | 7 |
| S | Reggie Wayne WR IND | 18 |
| B | Tory Humphrey TE GB | 4 |
| B | Alge Crumpler TE TEN | 3 |
| B | David Martin TE MIA | 4 |
| S | Chris Cooley TE WAS | 20 |
| S | Owen Daniels TE HOU | 18 |
| I | Josh Brown K LAR | 0 |
| S | Josh Scobee K JAC | 2 |
| S | Jacksonville OST JAC | 14 |
| B | Cory Redding DT DET | 2 |
| I | Antwan Odom DE CIN | 0 |
| B | Jay Richardson DE LV | 6 |
| I | Adam Carriker DT LAR | 0 |
| S | Charles Johnson DE CAR | 0 |
| S | Jamaal Anderson DE ATL | 2 |
| B | Justin Harrell DT GB | 1 |
| B | Jarvis Moss DE DEN | 1 |
| I | Cullen Jenkins DE GB | 0 |
| S | Johnny Jolly DT GB | 3 |
| S | Barry Cofield DT NYG | 7 |
| S | Shaun Phillips OLB LAC | 7 |
| S | Stewart Bradley MLB PHI | 18 |
| B | Daryl Smith OLB JAC | 3 |
| S | Ernie Sims OLB DET | 4 |
| B | Lofa Tatupu MLB SEA | 6 |
| B | Ronde Barber CB TB | 5 |
| I | Kelvin Hayden CB IND | 0 |
| S | Tim Jennings CB IND | 4 |
| B | Chris Houston CB ATL | 4 |
| S | Cortland Finnegan CB TEN | 2 |
| S | Bernard Pollard S KC | 4 |
| B | Tanard Jackson S TB | 3 |
| B | Sabby Piscitelli S TB | 3 |
| I | James Sanders S NE | 0 |
| B | Darren Sharper S MIN | 4 |
| S | Brodney Pool S CLE | 3 |
| I | Andy Lee P SF | 0 |
| S | Adam Podlesh P JAC | 3 |
| S | Jacksonville DST JAC | 1 |
|
| Game Summary (Ralph Jones, NetFL Press)
awful. That word does not even begin to describe the game I saw today. Despite the ambient weather, I found myself looking upon the cold, dark, windswept gridiron of my soul, agonizing for three gut-wrenching hours as my eyes were forced to witness the utter lack of skill exhibited by RNR on this particular day. By the end of the opening kickoff, I could already feel the nausea, the lurching in my stomach. By the end of the first quarter, I began to contemplate gnawing off my own leg to escape. My tears flowed as freely as the cheap beer consumed by the semi-sentients surrounding me, not for the defeated, but for the death of all that I thought was good and pure about football.
And so now it stands that AW trails the all-time series 5-7 against RNR. AW has a 7-4 regular season record. RNR has a 2-9 regular season record. The latest (what I shall laughingly call a) contest saw AW has decaffeinated RNR as though they were naught but a group of frenchmen on the battlefield 52-35 in front of a despondent home crowd.
They were almost perfect on the AW squad particularly on the offensive side of the ball last week as they racked up a combined 291 points, 195 on offense and 96 on defense. Justin Gage with 33 points on offense and Stewart Bradley with 18 points on defense were the top scorers. Mistakes dampened the mood around the locker room somewhat. Said Coach/GM Tim Shoemaker, "There were some mental breakdowns on both sides of the ball.. For one, Johnny Jolly played about as well as a frog pithed by an epileptic first-grader. Stimulus. Response. That's all there is to it. Pavlov had a dog and I've got this idiot. I've noticed that the red tazer in particular gets him ready for the games. As for those DST? They were utterly incompetent, gaining 3 Punt returns defended, 24 Defended punt return yardage, 8 Defended punt return average, 3 Defended kickoff returns, 73 Defended kickoff return yardage, 24.333 Defended kickoff return average instead of playing. Overall though, the team goat in this game was Justin Harrell. His nasty effort yielded precious little to praise.
There's no love lost between these two clubs. Tim Shoemaker exclaimed, "Sheesh... just mentioning their scaly hides makes me feel very unclean. They're wretched, infantile little sewer rats and I don't want to get dragged into a discussion about them. Any other questions? I need to bathe." In response, the RNR coach whined, "That owner of theirs kinda reminds me of a Matt Millen and Michael Jackson hybrid... all bluster, melting face, questionable personal tastes... not exactly the kind of person I'd invite to my child's birthday party." |
