| Off | Def | Total | Score |
|---|
| Away | Demonic Hordes | 157 | 145 | 302 | 7 | | Home | Southside Salamanders | 168 | 144 | 312 | 12 |
| Southside Salamanders |
Demonic Hordes |
|---|
| S | Aaron Rodgers QB GB | 23 |
| I | J.P. Losman QB BUF | 0 |
| I | Trent Edwards QB BUF | 0 |
| S | Matt Flynn QB GB | 0 |
| S | Brian Brohm QB ??? | 0 |
| I | Gibran Hamdan QB ??? | 0 |
| S | Scott Wells OC/OG GB | 8 |
| I | Mike Goff OG LAC | 0 |
| I | Artis Hicks OG ??? | 0 |
| S | Chris Kuper OG DEN | 6 |
| I | Duane Brown OT HOU | 0 |
| S | Tra Thomas OT ??? | 9 |
| S | Michael Roos OT TEN | 11 |
| S | Jake Scott OG TEN | 9 |
| B | Frank Gore RB SF | 0 |
| S | Reggie Bush RB NO | 7 |
| S | Chris Johnson RB TEN | 10 |
| B | Fred Jackson RB BUF | 5 |
| I | Mark Bradley WR KC | 0 |
| B | Vincent Jackson WR LAC | 6 |
| I | Drew Carter WR ??? | 0 |
| S | Greg Jennings WR GB | 12 |
| B | Sidney Rice WR MIN | 2 |
| I | Jason Carter WR ??? | 0 |
| B | James Jones WR GB | 5 |
| S | Brandon Marshall WR DEN | 11 |
| S | Dustin Keller TE NYJ | 23 |
| B | Brent Celek TE PHI | 3 |
| I | Kellen Winslow TE CLE | 0 |
| I | Garrett Hartley K NO | 0 |
| S | Mason Crosby K GB | 12 |
| S | Green Bay OST GB | 2 |
| S | Justin Bannan NT BAL | 2 |
| S | Dwight Freeney DE IND | 0 |
| I | Kelly Gregg DL ??? | 0 |
| B | Danny Clark OLB NYG | 3 |
| S | Keith Bulluck OLB TEN | 3 |
| B | Ryan Nece OLB DET | 5 |
| S | Manny Lawson OLB SF | 5 |
| B | Kevin Burnett ILB DAL | 1 |
| B | Jon Alston OLB/S LV | 1 |
| I | Bryan Kehl OLB NYG | 0 |
| S | Channing Crowder ILB MIA | 13 |
| B | Bart Scott ILB BAL | 5 |
| I | Omar Gaither OLB PHI | 0 |
| S | David Harris ILB NYJ | 12 |
| S | Alex Brown DE CHI | 9 |
| B | Terrell Thomas CB NYG | 4 |
| I | Rashean Mathis CB JAC | 0 |
| B | Antoine Cason CB LAC | 2 |
| I | Brent Grimes CB ATL | 0 |
| B | Fred Bennett CB HOU | 3 |
| B | Brian Russell S SEA | 2 |
| S | Daniel Bullocks S DET | 8 |
| B | Hiram Eugene S LV | 2 |
| S | Jarrad Page S KC | 10 |
| I | Chinedum Ndukwe S CIN | 0 |
| B | Atari Bigby S GB | 0 |
| I | Aaron Rouse S GB | 0 |
| S | Brandon McDonald CB CLE | 30 |
| S | Darrelle Revis CB NYJ | 9 |
| I | Brandon Fields P MIA | 0 |
| S | Brett Kern P DEN | 12 |
| S | Tampa Bay DST TB | 3 |
|
| S | Kevin Kolb QB PHI | -6 |
| S | A.J. Feeley QB ??? | 0 |
| S | Donovan McNabb QB PHI | 39 |
| I | Todd Collins QB ??? | 0 |
| I | Colt Brennan QB ??? | 0 |
| I | Jason Campbell QB WAS | 0 |
| I | Jonathan Goodwin OC/OG NO | 0 |
| S | Stephen Neal OG NE | 14 |
| S | Eugene Amano OG ??? | 11 |
| I | Mike Brisiel OG HOU | 0 |
| I | Carl Nicks OT NO | 0 |
| S | Kris Dielman OG ??? | 4 |
| I | Anthony Herrera OG ??? | 0 |
| S | David Stewart OT TEN | 12 |
| S | Ryan Harris OT DEN | 5 |
| I | Jamaal Charles RB KC | 0 |
| I | Jerious Norwood RB ATL | 0 |
| S | Leon Washington RB NYJ | 13 |
| I | Willis McGahee RB BAL | 0 |
| I | Peyton Hillis FB DEN | 0 |
| B | Davone Bess WR MIA | 2 |
| S | Wes Welker WR NE | 22 |
| I | Donald Driver WR GB | 0 |
| S | T.J. Houshmandzadeh WR CIN | 6 |
| B | Anthony Gonzalez WR IND | 1 |
| I | Mark Clayton WR BAL | 0 |
| B | Marcedes Lewis TE JAC | 3 |
| S | Tony Scheffler TE DEN | 4 |
| S | Kevin Boss TE NYG | 4 |
| S | Rob Bironas K TEN | 14 |
| I | Nick Folk K DAL | 0 |
| S | Seattle OST SEA | 9 |
| S | Justin Tuck DE NYG | 7 |
| S | Jevon Kearse DE TEN | 12 |
| S | Vince Wilfork NT NE | 3 |
| S | Chad Greenway OLB MIN | 10 |
| B | Anthony Spencer OLB DAL | 2 |
| I | Osi Umenyiora OLB ??? | 0 |
| S | Rocky Boiman OLB/MLB KC | 7 |
| B | Clint Session OLB IND | 8 |
| I | Tyjuan Hagler OLB IND | 0 |
| S | Karlos Dansby ILB ARI | 8 |
| B | Tim Dobbins ILB LAC | 2 |
| B | Zach Thomas ILB DAL | 2 |
| S | Jerod Mayo ILB NE | 11 |
| B | Clint Ingram OLB JAC | 4 |
| I | Leroy Hill OLB SEA | 0 |
| B | Leon Williams ILB CLE | 0 |
| B | Fakhir Brown CB LAR | 2 |
| B | Carlos Rogers CB WAS | 1 |
| B | Antonio Cromartie CB LAC | 0 |
| S | Brandon Flowers CB KC | 16 |
| B | Josh Wilson CB SEA | 2 |
| S | Leon Hall CB CIN | 9 |
| B | Josh Bell CB DEN | 5 |
| B | Josh Bullocks S NO | 6 |
| S | Yeremiah Bell S MIA | 8 |
| B | Sean Jones S CLE | 4 |
| S | Adrian Wilson S ARI | 9 |
| B | Kyries Hebert S CIN | 4 |
| I | Jon Ryan P SEA | 0 |
| S | Mike Scifres P LAC | 3 |
| S | New York (N) DST NYG | 0 |
|
| Game Summary (Ralph Jones, NetFL Press)
I love football. The stale smell of rancid beer, the sweaty crowd of rabid fans, the cross-eyed and homely cheerleaders trying to incite us to collective ear-drum rupturing noise, the reverberating sound of vicious collisions, the poetic beauty of a laser-guided bullet pass crashing into the receiver's outstretched hands - yes, this is what I live for. This is what I saw today. Kudos to SRS for pulling out a meat cleaver, emasculating them and definitively putting on the superior show, but overall, it was quite a frenetic, enjoyable game.
And so now it stands that SRS trails the all-time series 7-11 against DH. SRS has a 12-0 regular season record (1-0 in this year's playoffs) having just won the Conference Championship game. DH has a 10-2 regular season record (1-1 in this year's playoffs) having just lost the Conference Championship game. The latest (what I shall laughingly call a) contest saw SRS overwhelming DH as though they were an all you can eat buffet residing next to a weight-watcher's clinic 12-7 in front of a jeering and hostile crowd.
Things went very well for the SRS squad particularly on the defensive side of the ball last week as they racked up a combined 312 points, 168 on offense and 144 on defense. Vincent Jackson with 24 points on offense and Brandon McDonald with 30 points on defense were the top scorers. Several mental breakdowns drew the coach's ire. Said Coach/GM Allen Cummings, "We had a few breakdowns. . For one, Fred Jackson was clearly showing some ill-effects from his intestinal parasite. That procedure he had a couple weeks back... labotomy, I think Doc said - well, that thing has done wonders for his game. He just stands in there and takes it now - play after play after play. No more of this whining about being too hurt. Doc is brilliant, I say. As for those OLB/S? They were utterly incompetent, gaining 1 Tackles while taking the day off. Overall though, the the most incompetant player in this game was Jon Alston. His grotesque effort yielded a venom-filled snarl of anger from his position coach.
"Dem's fightin' woids!": Fuel was added to the fire during the two teams' post game news conferences. Allen Cummings exclaimed, "Nah, I don't have anything against them. They're kinda like little bunnies or maybe pop warner rejects.... kinda cute and all, but pretty impotent when it comes to football." In response, the DH coach gurgled, "That owner of theirs kinda reminds me of a Matt Millen and Michael Jackson hybrid... all bluster, melting face, questionable personal tastes... not exactly the kind of person I'd invite to my child's birthday party." |
