Boxscore
| Game Summary (Earl Schmidt, NetFL Press) I get paid very well doing something I usually enjoy. There are, however, occasional games that I only report on under silent protest. Let me begin by being brutally honest. SC is quite the ascetic team, wholly outclassed in all aspects of the game by LLL. Yikes! SC has just completed a game in which they, proverbially speaking, used my mother's fancy plate collection as clay pigeons. To point fingers after this debacle would be unfair given that this most assuredly was a team effort - and that's the only positive spin I can put on the game. Ben Roethlisberger considered this when he said, "They came at us with some tough schemes, but we were able to put a few decent plays together. I think we can move the ball against anyone, stop anyone and we just didn't execute today." Roberto Garza stated, "No comment." When pressed, he added, "Get out of my face, man... I don't want to get fined for shoving that there microphone in a deep, dark crevass on your person if you catch my drift." LLL has feasted upon SC as though they were horses being sent to the glue factory, stomping their dead, bloated corpses by the tune of 87-39 in front of a jeering and hostile crowd. LLL trails the all-time series 7-12 against SC. LLL has a 8-4 regular season record (1-0 in this year's playoffs). SC has a 3-9 regular season record. They were almost perfect on the LLL squad particularly on the offensive side of the ball last week as they racked up a combined 320 points, 227 on offense and 93 on defense. Tony Romo with 48 points on offense and Matt Bosher with 20 points on defense were the top scorers. Mistakes dampened the mood around the locker room somewhat. Said Coach/GM Scott Lawrence, "We had a few breakdowns. . For one, Matt Bosher played about as well as a frog pithed by an epileptic first-grader. Doc says that he secretes some sort of viscous slime from his arms when he gets hot. This in turn makes the ball, his uniform, his hands, whatever - kinda slick. If you look at many of his 3789 miscues over the year, you can see that often times, nobody even touches him and he falls down, the ball slips out of his hands, or he misfires on a play. As for those DL? They showed their ineptitude by amassing 1 Tackles instead of playing. Overall though, the as voted on by his teammates, the most worthless player in this game was David Hawthorne. Though the game was already decided on the field, apparently neither team was done. Scott Lawrence shot, "That owner of theirs kinda reminds me of a Matt Millen and Michael Jackson hybrid... all bluster, melting face, questionable personal tastes... not exactly the kind of person I'd invite to my child's birthday party." In response, the SC coach groaned, "Oh, they're harmless... a bit annoying too, I guess... Kinda remind me of Barney or Big Bird..." | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||