| Off | Def | Total | Score |
|---|
| Away | Westside Smoke | 185 | 116 | 301 | 26 | | Home | Southside Salamanders | 247 | 133 | 380 | 66 |
| Southside Salamanders |
Westside Smoke |
|---|
| S | Scott Tolzien QB GB | 0 |
| I | Ryan Nassib QB NYG | 0 |
| S | Matt Flynn QB GB | 2 |
| I | Eli Manning QB NYG | 0 |
| S | Aaron Rodgers QB GB | 48 |
| S | Scott Wells OC LAR | 12 |
| I | Ben Jones OC HOU | 0 |
| S | James Carpenter OG SEA | 12 |
| S | T.J. Lang OG GB | 13 |
| I | Josh Sitton OG GB | 0 |
| S | Riley Reiff OT DET | 6 |
| S | Duane Brown OT HOU | 10 |
| I | Donald Stephenson OT KC | 0 |
| B | Kyle Juszczyk FB BAL | 3 |
| S | Arian Foster RB HOU | 25 |
| I | Lance Dunbar RB DAL | 0 |
| B | Benny Cunningham RB LAR | 5 |
| B | Joique Bell RB DET | 5 |
| I | Danny Woodhead RB LAC | 0 |
| S | Jamaal Charles RB KC | 22 |
| I | De'Anthony Thomas RB KC | 0 |
| B | Davante Adams WR GB | 3 |
| I | Corey Brown WR CAR | 0 |
| B | Marqise Lee WR JAC | 1 |
| S | Markus Wheaton WR PIT | 0 |
| I | Aaron Dobson WR NE | 0 |
| B | Robert Woods WR BUF | 2 |
| I | Rod Streater WR LV | 0 |
| S | Kendall Wright WR TEN | 21 |
| B | Daniel Fells TE NYG | 5 |
| I | Kyle Rudolph TE MIN | 0 |
| S | Jared Cook TE LAR | 17 |
| B | Brandon Williams TE CAR | 3 |
| B | C.J. Fiedorowicz TE HOU | 3 |
| B | Derek Carrier TE SF | 1 |
| S | Mason Crosby K GB | 14 |
| I | Cairo Santos K KC | 0 |
| S | San Francisco OST SF | 10 |
| S | Ryan Kerrigan OLB WAS | 7 |
| S | Wes Horton DE CAR | 2 |
| S | Mike Daniels DE GB | 0 |
| S | Steve McLendon NT PIT | 0 |
| I | B.J. Raji NT ??? | 0 |
| S | Koa Misi OLB MIA | 10 |
| B | Jacquian Williams OLB NYG | 4 |
| B | Jonathan Massaquoi OLB ATL | 5 |
| I | Danny Trevathan OLB DEN | 0 |
| B | Wesley Woodyard ILB TEN | 8 |
| I | Ryan Shazier ILB PIT | 0 |
| S | A.J. Hawk ILB GB | 6 |
| S | Curtis Lofton ILB NO | 19 |
| B | Jason Verrett CB LAC | 0 |
| I | Sam Shields CB GB | 0 |
| S | Casey Hayward CB GB | 10 |
| B | Desmond Trufant CB ATL | 4 |
| S | Kyle Fuller CB CHI | 5 |
| B | Mike Adams S IND | 2 |
| S | Ha Ha Clinton-Dix S GB | 10 |
| I | Delano Howell S ??? | 0 |
| I | Eric Berry S KC | 0 |
| S | Reshad Jones S MIA | 16 |
| B | George Iloka S CIN | 3 |
| I | Tim Masthay P GB | 0 |
| S | Johnny Hekker P LAR | 19 |
| S | Baltimore DST BAL | 3 |
|
| S | Matt Hasselbeck QB IND | 0 |
| I | Josh McCown QB TB | 0 |
| I | Mike Kafka QB TB | 0 |
| S | Andrew Luck QB IND | 46 |
| I | Mike Glennon QB TB | 0 |
| S | Dominic Raiola OC DET | 5 |
| I | Jonotthan Harrison OC IND | 0 |
| S | Charlie Johnson OG MIN | 5 |
| S | Shawn Lauvao OG WAS | 4 |
| I | Shelley Smith OG MIA | 0 |
| S | Russell Okung OT SEA | 12 |
| S | Anthony Castonzo OT IND | 10 |
| I | Ja'Wuan James OT MIA | 0 |
| S | Pierre Thomas RB NO | 8 |
| I | Shonn Greene RB TEN | 0 |
| I | Dri Archer RB PIT | 0 |
| I | Ryan Mathews RB LAC | 0 |
| B | Jason Avant WR KC | 1 |
| B | Devin Hester WR ATL | 2 |
| B | DeSean Jackson WR WAS | 2 |
| S | Steve Smith WR BAL | 11 |
| S | Reggie Wayne WR IND | 7 |
| S | Demaryius Thomas WR DEN | 40 |
| B | Benjamin Watson TE NO | 2 |
| B | Dion Sims TE MIA | 3 |
| B | James Hanna TE DAL | 2 |
| S | Delanie Walker TE TEN | 7 |
| S | Chandler Catanzaro K ARI | 8 |
| S | New York (N) OST NYG | 10 |
| I | Oakland OST LV | 0 |
| I | Adrian Clayborn DE TB | 0 |
| B | Jared Crick DE HOU | 3 |
| S | Justin Tuck DE LV | 0 |
| B | Wallace Gilberry DE CIN | 3 |
| S | Damon Harrison NT NYJ | 0 |
| S | Jared Allen DE CHI | 6 |
| S | Clay Matthews OLB GB | 4 |
| I | Robert Mathis OLB ??? | 0 |
| B | Jo-Lonn Dunbar OLB LAR | 2 |
| S | Thomas Davis OLB CAR | 11 |
| I | Brandon Graham OLB PHI | 0 |
| I | Joe Mays ILB KC | 0 |
| S | Donald Butler ILB LAC | 8 |
| S | Jerrell Freeman ILB IND | 7 |
| B | Michael Wilhoite ILB SF | 4 |
| B | Joplo Bartu ILB ATL | 7 |
| I | Dannell Ellerbe OLB MIA | 0 |
| B | E.J. Gaines DB LAR | 4 |
| S | Carlos Rogers CB LV | 6 |
| B | Tim Jennings CB CHI | 4 |
| I | Cary Williams CB PHI | 0 |
| I | Bradley Fletcher CB PHI | 0 |
| S | Greg Toler CB IND | 3 |
| I | LaRon Landry S IND | 0 |
| S | Rodney McLeod S LAR | 6 |
| S | Jimmy Wilson S MIA | 0 |
| B | Antonio Allen S NYJ | 2 |
| B | Tony Jefferson S ARI | 2 |
| B | Ryan Clark S WAS | 1 |
| B | Corey White CB NO | 5 |
| I | Drew Butler P ARI | 0 |
| S | Pat McAfee P IND | 16 |
| S | Pittsburgh DST PIT | 12 |
|
| Game Summary (Ralph Jones, NetFL Press)
Andrew Luck stated, "They came at us with some tough schemes, but we were able to put a few decent plays together. I think we can move the ball against anyone, stop anyone and we just didn't execute today." Well no kidding, Einstein. TH was bad. Awful. Grotesque. An embarrassment to the league, I dare say. I love football. The stale smell of rancid beer, the sweaty crowd of rabid fans, the cross-eyed and homely cheerleaders trying to incite us to collective ear-drum rupturing noise, the reverberating sound of vicious collisions, the poetic beauty of a laser-guided bullet pass crashing into the receiver's outstretched hands - yes, this is what I live for. This is what I saw today. Kudos to SRS for pulling out a willow switch, maiming their egos and definitively putting on the superior show, but overall, it was quite a frenetic, enjoyable game.
So now the series stands SRS leads the all-time series 3-2 against TH. SRS has a 7-0 regular season record. TH has a 4-3 regular season record. The latest (what I shall laughingly call a) contest saw SRS bludgeoning TH as though they were an all you can eat buffet residing next to a weight-watcher's clinic 66-26 in front of a jeering and hostile crowd.
They looked unstoppable on the SRS squad on both sides of the ball last week as they racked up a combined 380 points, 247 on offense and 133 on defense. Aaron Rodgers with 48 points on offense and Curtis Lofton with 19 points on defense were the top scorers. All that aside, team goat of the game goes to Eric Berry. I've come up with a
motivational plan for every player I deem to be failing to live up to their potential..."
Says Eric Berry, pouring out of a far-too-tight yellow bikini, "I have nothing to say about this."
Brandon Williams added, "Words fail me... got it? I ain't had a single night's sleep since coach made that call last Monday, man. I keep waking up screaming. I mean dang, man... time to put some time on the thigh-master."
"Dem's fightin' woids!": Fuel was added to the fire during the two teams' post game news conferences. Allen Cummings droned, "Gosh... why are you even wasting my time looking for a comment about them? They're kinda like cockroaches - to be sure, they occasionally crawl out of the woodwork to be seen by all, but usually, they're lurking somewhere out of sight." In response, the TH coach said, "Hitler, Stalin... perhaps a few others... yeah, he belongs on that exclusive list, if you catch my drift. I sleep well at night, but given all the people he's no doubt stomped on to get where he is, I doubt the same can be said of him." |
