Boxscore
| Game Summary (Ralph Jones, NetFL Press) Tom Brady noted, "Our defense was stout - I mean, golly. Have you ever seen such an effort? I mean, except for those breakdowns that led to all those scores. For at least half of the plays, we were great though. It's something to build on is all I'm getting at." Well no kidding, Einstein. DH was bad. Awful. Grotesque. An embarrassment to the league, I dare say. OK, so not everyone who wears the uniform should be allowed to suit up. Such is most certainly the case for Mike Nugent, the greatest goat this side of the fairytale land of satyrs, unicorns, pixies, and winning DH seasons. This journalist found himself maintaining sanity amidst the botched stumbling of Tom Brady and his sidekicks by drinking heavily and choking down moldy peanuts. Now, to DH's credit, they willingly subjected themselves to this game, knowing full well how it was likely to turn out, but I place a great deal of blame on PC for opting for this game over a likely more challenging foray against the Vienna Boy's Choir. So now the series stands PC trails the all-time series 1-3 against DH. PC has a 4-3 regular season record. DH has a 2-5 regular season record. The latest (what I shall laughingly call a) contest saw PC has decaffeinated DH as though they were horses being sent to the glue factory 36-16 in front of a despondent home crowd. Things went very well for the PC squad even though they did not excel on either side of the ball last week as they racked up a combined 283 points, 164 on offense and 119 on defense. Alex Smith with 33 points on offense and Paul Posluszny with 21 points on defense were the top scorers. All that aside, as voted on by his teammates, the most worthless player of the game goes to Keith Rivers. Some players need a bit more instruction than others. I've tried a few less orthodox teaching tools from time to time..." Says Keith Rivers, dragging around a cart full of dirty laundry, "Coach says he'll find a use for me in this system if it kills us both. Yo, just gimme a little slack, man. But this, goin' from starter not even to the bench... I'm bein' disrespected!" Josh Robinson added, "I ain't sayin' nothin'... OK, maybe just a little. Dude's even worse here than on the field. Starching everyone's straps? Using so much bleach it dissolves the danged cotton? I'm almost at the point where I want to go into Coach's doghouse just so I can get some properly handled laundry!" "Dem's fightin' woids!": Fuel was added to the fire during the two teams' post game news conferences. Glenn Good quipped, "They stink, not in that 'festering sewage inside a porta-potty next to a dead, bloated cow floating in a culvert' way, but more in the 'the Vienna Boy's Choir has more football talent' way." In response, the DH coach groaned, "I feel kinda sorry for them, to be honest. I mean, how can you be that inept, that pitiable? I guess they occasionally get my blood flowing, but for the most part, playing them is about as exciting as rearranging my sock drawer." | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||