| Off | Def | Total | Score |
|---|
| Away | The Spanish Inquisition | 169 | 108 | 277 | 46 | | Home | The Blitz | 197 | 77 | 274 | 45 |
| The Blitz |
The Spanish Inquisition |
|---|
| S | Peyton Manning QB DEN | 51 |
| I | Michael Vick QB NYJ | 0 |
| I | Geno Smith QB NYJ | 0 |
| S | Brock Osweiler QB DEN | 0 |
| S | Zac Dysert QB ??? | 0 |
| I | Tajh Boyd QB ??? | 0 |
| I | Alex Mack OC CLE | 0 |
| S | Rodney Hudson OC KC | 3 |
| I | Mike Pouncey OC MIA | 0 |
| S | John Greco OG CLE | 11 |
| I | Allen Barbre OG PHI | 0 |
| I | Chad Rinehart OG LAC | 0 |
| S | Ben Grubbs OG NO | 8 |
| I | Ryan Wendell OC NE | 0 |
| I | Xavier Su'a-Filo OG HOU | 0 |
| I | Jack Mewhort OG IND | 0 |
| I | Eric Fisher OT KC | 0 |
| I | Matt Kalil OT MIN | 0 |
| S | Jermey Parnell OT DAL | 0 |
| S | Rick Wagner OT BAL | 9 |
| I | Mike Tolbert FB CAR | 0 |
| B | Marcel Reece FB LV | 2 |
| B | Khiry Robinson RB NO | 0 |
| B | Doug Martin RB TB | 0 |
| S | Lamar Miller RB MIA | 2 |
| I | Montee Ball RB DEN | 0 |
| S | Tre Mason RB LAR | 14 |
| I | James White RB NE | 0 |
| S | Kelvin Benjamin WR CAR | 23 |
| B | Jarvis Landry WR MIA | 3 |
| B | Jacob Tamme TE DEN | 4 |
| S | Jason Witten TE DAL | 28 |
| S | Brandon Pettigrew TE DET | 8 |
| B | Josh Hill TE NO | 3 |
| I | Chase Ford TE MIN | 0 |
| B | Troy Niklas TE ARI | 2 |
| B | Gavin Escobar TE DAL | 4 |
| S | Stephen Hauschka K SEA | 13 |
| I | Josh Brown K NYG | 0 |
| S | San Francisco OST SF | 5 |
| I | Whitney Mercilus OLB HOU | 0 |
| I | Trent Murphy OLB WAS | 0 |
| B | Courtney Upshaw OLB BAL | 2 |
| B | Greg Hardy DE CAR | 0 |
| S | Cliff Avril DE SEA | 7 |
| I | Sharrif Floyd DT MIN | 0 |
| I | Nick Fairley DT DET | 0 |
| S | Justin Smith DT SF | 7 |
| S | Sheldon Richardson DE NYJ | 4 |
| S | Kawann Short DT CAR | 0 |
| B | Shea McClellin OLB CHI | 4 |
| S | Vincent Rey MLB CIN | 9 |
| S | Paul Kruger OLB CLE | 4 |
| S | Justin Houston OLB KC | 4 |
| I | Stephen Tulloch MLB DET | 0 |
| B | Jon Bostic MLB CHI | 3 |
| I | Charles Tillman CB CHI | 0 |
| S | Leodis McKelvin CB BUF | 3 |
| S | Perrish Cox CB SF | 6 |
| B | Antrel Rolle S NYG | 4 |
| B | Darian Stewart S BAL | 1 |
| S | Reggie Nelson S CIN | 11 |
| S | Michael Griffin S TEN | 4 |
| I | Darrelle Revis CB NE | 0 |
| I | Ryan Allen P NE | 0 |
| S | Pat O'Donnell P CHI | 4 |
| S | Denver DST DEN | 0 |
|
| I | Matthew Stafford QB DET | 0 |
| I | Kellen Moore QB DET | 0 |
| S | Drew Stanton QB ARI | 9 |
| S | Carson Palmer QB ARI | 26 |
| I | Dan Orlovsky QB DET | 0 |
| I | JC Tretter OC GB | 0 |
| I | Alex Boone OG SF | 0 |
| I | Lance Louis OG IND | 0 |
| S | Kelechi Osemele OG BAL | 9 |
| S | Manny Ramirez OC DEN | 12 |
| S | Kevin Zeitler OG CIN | 3 |
| S | Michael Ola OT CHI | 3 |
| S | Zach Strief OT NO | 8 |
| I | Doug Free OT DAL | 0 |
| I | Adrian Peterson RB MIN | 0 |
| I | Cordarrelle Patterson WR MIN | 0 |
| S | Ronnie Hillman RB DEN | 5 |
| I | Roy Helu RB WAS | 0 |
| I | Rashad Jennings RB NYG | 0 |
| I | Andre Johnson WR HOU | 0 |
| S | Brandin Cooks WR NO | 23 |
| S | Jeremy Maclin WR PHI | 8 |
| S | A.J. Green WR CIN | 6 |
| B | Charles Clay TE MIA | 4 |
| B | Clay Harbor TE JAC | 3 |
| S | Austin Seferian-Jenkins TE TB | 20 |
| S | Logan Thomas QB ARI | 0 |
| B | Richard Rodgers TE GB | 3 |
| S | Billy Cundiff K CLE | 9 |
| I | Greg Zuerlein K LAR | 0 |
| I | Minnesota OST MIN | 0 |
| S | Chicago OST CHI | 18 |
| S | Chris Clemons DE JAC | 2 |
| S | Ezekiel Ansah DE DET | 12 |
| S | Clinton McDonald DT TB | 5 |
| S | Jeremiah Ratliff DT CHI | 3 |
| I | Justin Durant MLB DAL | 0 |
| I | Jamie Collins OLB NE | 0 |
| S | Emmanuel Lamur OLB CIN | 8 |
| S | Barkevious Mingo OLB CLE | 0 |
| B | Deone Bucannon S ARI | 4 |
| B | Kyle Van Noy OLB DET | 1 |
| B | Demarcus Lawrence DE DAL | 1 |
| I | Chandler Jones DE NE | 0 |
| S | Luke Kuechly MLB CAR | 10 |
| B | Brandon Spikes MLB BUF | 2 |
| B | Rolando McClain MLB DAL | 0 |
| B | Justin Gilbert CB CLE | 0 |
| S | D.J. Hayden CB LV | 10 |
| B | Alterraun Verner CB TB | 0 |
| S | Aqib Talib CB DEN | 3 |
| B | Sean Smith CB KC | 1 |
| B | Leon Hall CB CIN | 0 |
| I | Harrison Smith S MIN | 0 |
| S | Ryan Mundy S CHI | 16 |
| B | Marcus Williams DB NYJ | 3 |
| B | Bradley McDougald S TB | 1 |
| B | T.J. McDonald S LAR | 8 |
| S | Chris Conte S CHI | 4 |
| S | Sam Martin P DET | 13 |
| S | Philadelphia DST PHI | 1 |
|
| Game Summary (Ralph Jones, NetFL Press)
revolting. That word does not even begin to describe the game I saw today. Despite the ambient weather, I found myself looking upon the cold, dark, windswept gridiron of my soul, agonizing for three gut-wrenching hours as my eyes were forced to witness the utter lack of skill exhibited by TB on this particular day. By the end of the opening kickoff, I could already feel the nausea, the lurching in my stomach. By the end of the first quarter, I began to contemplate gnawing off my own leg to escape. My tears flowed as freely as the cheap beer consumed by the semi-sentients surrounding me, not for the defeated, but for the death of all that I thought was good and pure about football.
And so now it stands that TSI trails the all-time series 15-16 against TB. TSI has a 8-2 regular season record. TB has a 3-7 regular season record. The latest (what I shall laughingly call a) contest saw TSI overwhelming TB like a bloated spider engorging on the tender underbelly of a common house fly 46-45 in front of a despondent home crowd.
Things went very well for the TSI squad even though they did not excel on either side of the ball last week as they racked up a combined 277 points, 169 on offense and 108 on defense. Matthew Stafford with 31 points on offense and Ryan Mundy with 16 points on defense were the top scorers. However, they were far from perfect. Said Coach/GM Al Burns, "There were some mental breakdowns on both sides of the ball.. For one, Barkevious Mingo performed like a spasmodic violinist. That procedure he had a couple weeks back... labotomy, I think Doc said - well, that thing has done wonders for his game. He just stands in there and takes it now - play after play after play. No more of this whining about being too hurt. Doc is brilliant, I say. As for those DST? They showed all the football grace of ballerinas as they filled the record book with 3 Punt returns defended, 24 Defended punt return yardage, 8 Defended punt return average, 3 Defended kickoff returns, 82 Defended kickoff return yardage, 27.333 Defended kickoff return average over the course of the contest. Overall though, the the most incompetant player in this game was Dan Orlovsky. His horrible effort yielded a resigned sigh from his teammates.
There's no love lost between these two clubs. Al Burns considered this when he said, "I suppose every league needs a doormat. I feel some degree of scorn for them to be sure, but mostly, I just shake my head and watch them bumble their way from game to game with a sense of detached amusement." In response, the TB coach whined, "That owner of theirs kinda reminds me of a Matt Millen and Michael Jackson hybrid... all bluster, melting face, questionable personal tastes... not exactly the kind of person I'd invite to my child's birthday party." |
